Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Day of doctor's appointments

Today started with Nick and I having a final consultation with our RE before my shots began. We wanted to confirm we are (still) all on the same page for our treatment of IVF. My shots start next Wed. (Jan. 7th) so please just keep me in your prayers as that process begins. Nick will bravely have to administer them...I'm sure some days he'll enjoy it!

After our appointment, Ryan and I went to see his NEW Ear, Nose and Throat specialist. We are excited that we feel this doctor is listening to our concerns about Ryan's history of irritability (AKA fits of rage), chest colds, digestive infections, sinus infections, etc. This doctor has agreed to do allergy testing NOW where our past doctor would not do it until age 5. I can't wait that long...I need some answers so I can help this little guy feel better. He has officially been off all dairy for over one week and I have seen a BIG improvement in his temperment. Who knew that there was dairy in things like caramel rice cakes...a favorite afternoon snack for me and Ry. I did some shopping at the Whole Foods market at Clay Terrace today to find him dairy-free butter, cheese slices, frozen waffles, yogurt, cereal, fish sticks, pizza, etc. All foods that most little ones get to enjoy! (Keep him in your prayers too as we try to narrow down what is bothering his little tummy so much.) The past month has been a huge trial for Nick and I as we anxiously want to grow our family but have experienced some very trying moments with Ryan.

Happy New Year to all!
The Vetor's

Monday, December 29, 2008

Weekend of December 6th

After being selected for The Cade Foundation grant we had to make a quick trip to D.C. to celebrate with The Cade Foundation family during their annual banquet. It's hard to explain the feeling we all had when we walked in. The foundation is mainly made up of one family, a grandmother who made the ultimate sacrifice on her body to carry her daughter & son in law's triplets! The daughter and now mother of 3 children heads this organization. These are people full of love and servants who truly believe in "paying it forward". Last year they were able to award 3 families and this year that grew to six! We are so excited to become the extended family of The Cade Foundation and share our IVF experience with them.

We are required and very excited to host our own fundraiser in 2009 for the 2010 Family Building Grant. We were the first family from Indiana ever selected and the furthest West of DC. We want to grow awareness of the struggles and pains of infertility while supporting such a wonderful organization. Our hope is that our fundraising efforts will make a BIG difference to a needy family in 2010.

Will you join us??? Look for more information to come as we make plans and set dates for fundraising events.

Please visit these websites to learn more:

Applying for The Family Building Grant

In late September I was up late searching for clinical studies and/or funding for IVF patients. By God's grace I came across a link to The Cade Foundation. http://cadefoundation.org/index.php I found that they offer "Family Building Grants" up to $10,000 for families hoping to adopt domestically or attempt IVF. I was up until 1 am completing the paperwork and getting everything ready to submit to our doctors who would have to vouch that we would be ideal candidates for this grant (as well as provide our medical history regarding infertility).

The application deadline was Sat. Oct. 4th. Being the worrier that I am Nick overnighted our 63 page application several days in advance. To our dismay we found out AFTER the deadline that it was returned to the mailing service we used (and we were not notified). Mom and I diligently tried to contact the Cade Foundation to explain the situation and thankfully they still accepted our application when if finally arrived (almost a week late).

The night before all recipients were to be notified God lead me to Jeremiah 17: 5-10 during some personal quiet time which reads...

"This is what the Lord says, 'Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who depends on flesh for his strength and whose heart turns away from the Lord. He will be like a bush in the wastelands; he will not see prosperity when it comes. He will dwell in the parched places of the desert, in a salt land where no one lives'."

"But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit."

"The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?"

"I the Lord search the heart and examine the mind, to reward a man according to his conduct, according to what his deeds deserve."

I read this over and over and felt like God had clearly answered my worries and doubts about whether or not we would be selected for the grant. (Of course, everyone else around me is telling me not to get my hopes up.) I just knew that God would provide for us!

Sat. the 15th came and no phone call. We waited and waited. It was a very hard day and I was more confused about what God was trying to tell me the night before. We even went out to celebrate the engagement of very close friends. We were so happy for them but torn apart inside. I decided that God would enlighten me about His decision Sunday morning at church but oddly enough after listening to the service I couldn't apply it to our situation. I was frustrated.

As Sunday rolled on, we moved on! While we were watching the Colts play Nick's cell phone rang. He quickly called me upstairs to share that The Cade Foundation had called and we were 1 of 6 families selected for The Family Building Grant. We fell to the floor in tears. We were able to share that moment with close family which was very special. I think everyone was shocked that we received this grant, not because we aren't deserving but because it was based out of Maryland and we already have one biological child.

THANK YOU GOD for the clearest answer to our prayers. We know that YOU support this decision and are with us through this process. What more could we ask for???

08/08/08...what a day

On August 8th my OB/GYN performed a radiology dye procedure called an HSG. The hope was that she could open my tube to allow us to conceive on our own (like we did with Ryan). The HSG was terribly painful and revealed that my tube is indeed blocked and further damaged from my ectopic miscarriage in Jan. 2008. We were so discouraged with this news and referred back to a fertility doctor for further assessment. This was the beginning of our journey.

In early September we met with our R.E. who suggested that IVF might be the best option for us to conceive again. Another laparoscopy might set me up for another ectopic pregnancy. We never thought it would come down to IVF being our only option but it seems that is the case.

Now the stress and tears begin...
We have no insurance coverage for IVF. How would be pay for this procedure without putting a hardship on our personal finances, budget and home? Do we just stop at one? How could we make that decision when we LONG for more children and for Ryan to have his own brother or sister. So many decisions ahead...